Moonlight Sonata 3rd Movement

I have to apologise. I have no authority to write anything but about myself. If the thought makes you want to slit your wrists and slide into the abyss of the water that pools in that bathtub, I do not blame you. I will even tell you in all honesty that I have many times felt that way. But I am a creature borne out of pride and with a heart so painfully naive that I am fated to analyse the very raindrop which falls on my head and wonder on its message. This is my health warning to you and I beseech you to turn away if the intricacies of my Life offends. My only hope is one day someone somewhere might stumble upon these pages of mine and find some sort of solace despite my passing. Enough of sorry thoughts, let us begin.

The night was hazy at best. The moon was faint beneath the cover of some envious cumulus clouds. A stubborn star peeked out and immediately I wished upon it. And you know that my wish stayed the same ever since I was ten. It remain firm and solid when everything else changes.

I was with company and a good one at that. But you will know by now I operate on two levels. My consciousness engage willingly yet my subconscious was already drafting this entry. You will forgive me indulging in my thoughts but they plague and bully me into submission and these entries are just purgings of my soul.

I asked for a sign during my solitude in some refuge that work has offered me. And it came in the form of a two dozen roses. I guess the world answers in mysterious ways. I find myself searching for something or someone who would fight for my sanity. It is a distasteful job I know but this spiral is just another opportunity to find out who will catch me in the end. I am resigned to my fate but the tarot cards keeps pulling out the Magician.

My destiny is still unwritten but I am so touched but the magnitude of the sacrifice that I cannot breathe. May God keep me in his sight and keep me just out of reach of the Devil's mischief. Do not judge my advances. It is merely done out of goodwill and the want of nothing.

Keep me in your thoughts and your prayers. I am betting on Life itself and the sweet merciful blessings of comfort. You enthrall me. So tonight I play for you.