The Conversation

Sir, may I come in? I heard you were looking for me.

Yes, come in..sit down I have something important to discuss with you.

Sir?

I have heard from trusted sources something very disturbing. Something unbecoming of a person of your education and most importantly your background. Now you know I do not jump to conclusions, I find that a luxury only those without position or power can afford. Now explain yourself, and make it quick but be wary that it is not sensational, that is another thing we cannot afford.

I do not understand what is it I am being charged for Sir.

Charged? You make it sound like this is an interrogation, now do not be melodramatic, we are only discussing our positions. Just explain your life and if it conforms to my beliefs then we will be fine.

Again Sir I am but perplexed to what am I suppose to answer.

Oh very well, you will not let off will you? Always wanting things to be out in the open, always looking for obvious signals. What are you doing with your life? This dilly-dallying you are indulging in. You should prep yourself in something more worthwhile. You should be making a name for yourself, introducing yourself to the right people, how do you expect to get anywhere in life? I have indulge your fantasies for much too long, this pursuit of education and experience.. do you not know that these are tools of the past?

But I am happy where I am Sir. I believe in the things I am doing. I feel so strongly about it.

Happy??? Are you putting me on? Happiness is an illusion, there is no such thing. Really, I thought you should know by now that happiness is up there with Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. All part of your imagination.

But I do not know what I am doing wrong. I thought I was living my life right, following my dreams.

Oh the naivety you display, have you not learnt anything? Your life is yours only to the extent that you allow society to set your destiny. You should listen to what people say and follow it through. It is your duty.

So it isn't my life at all is it?

Now, do not take that cheek with me... it's the whole potato or potato argument. You're coming up to 25 now, it's time to act responsibly. Now don't make a fuss, I know you listen much too easily that heart of yours, emotions are for fools. Remember that.

I still do not understand Sir, what is there to life if you are forbidden from following your own heart?

This is priceless son, you make me laugh you do. Forgive me... ha... I never laughed so hard.. you should have been a comedian, but of course the same talents are equally suited for being a politician.. you will do well. So you want to follow your heart? But then you are a slave to your passion. I did not raise you to be a slave.

Then we are just empty shells, what about the chase of your deepest darkest desire, the courage to pursue it? Is it not worth it? And what about Love? Isn't that the ultimate goal in life?

Love? Look around you son. Love is just a convenient tagline we give ourselves to mask our mistakes. You think that young voluptuous woman who marries that 81 year old millionaire is doing it for love? Or the wife that stays with the cheating husband does it for love? Or that anyone around you who stays for you is in it for the love? No... it is Money. The world runs on it. It is as vital as oxygen.

Then isn't it more reason to pursue it now, true love? To secure it now when I have nothing but my words and undying love to offer on this less than silver platter. And when you find it, to bask in in its intoxicating madness?

You want to feel that? I'll give you the money and you can buy it in packs of ten or in pills if you prefer it. The real thing is a one in a million.. no let's make it one in a billion shot. It's like winning the lottery but only harder.. now do you know anyone who has won the lottery? No? Well.. I proved my point. It's only an illusion.

But it's better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all.

According to whom? Which loser told you that?

Tennyson said that.

Hah! Well do you know that Tennyson had a history of mental illness. Epilepsy I think. Figures, only a madman would come up with something as preposterous as that. Tennyson indeed.

But then life would have no meaning, there must be more to it than just wealth.

Of course there is. Who said anything about just Money. There is also Power. Now they both go together like a horse and carriage. That's one marriage that will always go the distance.

Then everything I have learnt to be true would be a lie.

No, not a lie just an embellishment of the truth. Put it this way imagine your life as a wardrobe. You have the orange shirt hanged next to the green then yellow and blue and so forth. Well the truth of it is that life is not as colourful as that. Instead you hang your black shirt, next to your charcoal grey, midnight blue, and raven black. Now you get my drift? You still have choices it's just that you have to be more creative with your palette...I personally prefer to begin with the navyblue and work my way done to to pitch black but it is really a preference call.

But that makes no sense. What you are asking me to do is conform. I will be no different than everyone around me. I won't do it!

You just don't get it do you? You will do it, everyone else around you has and you are the last man standing so to speak. So despite these brave intentions and this whole me against the world stance, sooner or later the world will wear you down. It always has and all the people you love, they will abandon you until you are left alone. Then you will truly realise what being alone feels like. So do it now, it's like death..would you want to be shot or actually be the one to pull the trigger? Let's go out with some dignity or in that scenario with a bang! There is no choice anyway... it has been decided for you.

Then why bother having this discussion? Why take the trouble to convince me when it does not matter what I think?

Now, son remember what I said, no drama...what would the helpers think..next you'll want us to actually do the whole father and son thing which is just plain painful. You will thank me later. I wanted you to see how it's done. Then when you have son or a daughter you can tell it to them. This is our great legacy. A long tradition and you will not be the first that breaks it. We are done now, son... you can leave.

.... thank you, sir.

Remember son.... it is time to grow up.