It's late. I should be asleep or pretending to be at least. But all these thoughts, emotions and distractions are keeping me awake. I don't wish for sleep though right now. The calmness of twilight reassures me so let me savor it for just a little longer. Sigh a little louder and no one hears it.
This week has been manic. I felt as though my insides were a chaotic mess. Everything hanging on this delicate balance... like a tower of cards.. just waiting for the slightest breeze. But that is just on the inside. My surface is spotless. Unblemished and proud. Amiable and carefree. So authentic are my lines that I even fool myself... the architect of my own destruction.
Spare me sympathies for it is not discontent nor sadness which prevents me from slumber. Just a deeper understanding of my surroundings and the impending future. It is acceptance and even relief .. to walk right up to the mirror and recognise the face. There is no ill will I harbour... only a recognition of differences and the respect it should and would command. For what separates man and beast? It is the strength of thought... but perhaps manners is the most important of things. After all one must observe decorum over emotions.... it is only proper... anytime and every single time.
For now let us part and bid a courteous goodnight, for sleep will no longer be refused. Tomorrow's promise becomes more real by the second and I am excited to greet it with the freshness of mind and the warmest of hearts. I pray only sweet dreams eases you into the waking sun.
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