Chasing Pavements

The thing is its very much fashionable to chalk Valentine's Day as a commercial celebration which benefits none but the proprietors of roses and cuddly bears. And for Hallmark it's like Christmas but only better. After all who but lovesick teenagers celebrate it and somehow by seeing it that way, doing nothing seems almost like a silent protest against commercialism.

Or is it?

It is absolutely right that we shouldn't be pressured to show our love. I have heard it all before, the arguments that seem so old now. Love should be shown everyday and not just this one day. I get that, really I do.

Yet I wonder what the threat is that everyone seems to be afraid of. Does celebrating it mean you are a sell-out? Or a putz for paying over the moon for three stalks of dehydrated roses? Does society then shuns you if they found out and you are left to be a pariah?

Or perhaps it's something far more material. That there is a presumption that we have to shower each other with lavish gifts. After all diamonds are a girl's bestfriends. Personally I am for an emerald but then again that's for another day.

Or maybe it's because Valentine's Day makes liars out of us. The temptation to give false declarations and utter undying love. I don't think I would want anyone swimming the seven seas for me but then again I have never been a Michael Phelps fan so what do I know?

But after all that and being fully aware of all the above, would it be foolhardy to admit or rather confess that I love the whole ritual. I love the planning, the wanting to be creative but then failing miserably and rushing to the gas station for anything that is on sale. The presurre of trying to be poetic at the traffic light as you are rushing home for a shower, trying to compress a decade worth of heart into a card. The candlelit dinner and the feeding each other dessert. Desperately saying I-love-you a million different ways or so you think and Shakespeare laughing in his grave.

But those are things that goes through my mind and I know life is too full of intricacies that the perfect moment cannot possibly materialize. Yet I make no excuses for wanting to daydream a little longer of how it would be if the world would suddenly understand. For now I think it is enough that I understand the way it is. And yes I might be chasing pavements but you're worth the risk.

In the spirit of the moment and having made all my excuses, Happy Valentine's Day. I would make you a mix tape but then I remembered I am no longer the 17 year old with a crush on you. I have aged quite a bit and whilst outside there are things that are no longer attractive, my heart has not forgotten every look, every touch and every smile. I love you. Always have. Always will.

And that crush is still there too.